गुमनाम सी ज़िन्दगी
औपचारिक्ताओं में बंध गयी है...
ठहरे पानी में
ठहरे पानी में
तरंग सी उठ जाती है
जब यदा कदा
बज उठती है
सेल फ़ोन की घंटी
और फिर वही
मैं ठीक और आप ठीक...
पर ख़तम हो जाते हैं वार्तालाप।
प्रसंगहीन....
अर्थहीन....
भावहीन.....।
ज़िन्दगी की भाग-दौड़ में
शांत होते शिथिल रिश्ते।
अर्चना ~ 29-08-2013
Heart touching poem. I always found myself very sick to comment/ appreciate about poems just because I don't find words to write on someone's core feelings. Generally I read the particular several times and try to go back in the situation, mood and feeling when the creativity evolved. Its all about feeling..and the most enjoyable is when you personally know the creator.
ReplyDeleteWith all my best solidarity & support,
Salilesh Shukla
Thanks Salilesh Sir :)
DeleteArchna ji, very beautiful poem. but sometimes just talking arth heen, bhao heen etc is needed to keep on going, especially with the ones near and dear. even the very presence, never talking is also enough for reassurance. (I never wish to contradict your feelings here please.)
ReplyDelete(P.S. I read your tweets with relish. you seem to have a good heart)
Shukriya Shakil ji. Aapko poora haq hai contradict karne ka. Sabka apna nazariya hota hai :)
Deleteअति सुन्दर !! सच बोला है आपने :)
ReplyDeleteDhanyawaad Paras :)
DeleteJitna vistaar hua vigyan ka utna sankshipt hua bhandar hamare gyan ka!
ReplyDeleteSatya Vachan :)
Deletesachai to ye hai jitnee technology bad rahi insaaniyat khatam ho rahi hai - bheed mai akele paate hai. bus phone tha liya - haal chaal pooch - duty done - wo milna julna - hansee thatha sab gayab - sirf aupcharkta reh gayee hai -bhhag daud pehlay bhee thee - koi nai baat nahi hai - bas mansikta badal gayee hai.
ReplyDeleteSach Bola Sir ! Aapki iss line ne dil ko choo liya "bhhag daud pehlay bhee thee - koi nai baat nahi hai - bas mansikta badal gayee hai." Sach mein kahaan se kahaan aa gaye hum...
DeleteDhanyawaad, manobal badhaane ke liye :)
Your piece reminded me of something my dad once told me. About always trying to say things from the heart. Generic greetings and cordial responses is a social norm. But even in that an ounce of genuine care and concern can easily be added. Works magic every time. I have tried doing it. Even when saying hello I have stayed a minute longer to listen. A dying entity - listening.
ReplyDeleteThanks S. for sharing your Dad's views. Yea..I understand. Sometimes its not adding or removing anything, sometimes even silence adds lots of warmth. Its just how are we communicating that matters. I guess we are distant from warmth and becoming machine.
ReplyDeletemeri job me koi bhag daud ni hai....same since 3 months in 270 metre length...but best thing s phn ki ghanti ni bajti :-D but we have become so professional.....as I always u r just awesome in expressing feelings through ur post....n its really nice to read our own feelings...very touchy
ReplyDeleteThanks Amit for identifying with my feelings.... I still feel core expressions are missing in words as thoughts are more intense :)
ReplyDeleteजुबां मिली है मगर हमज़ुबाँ नहीं मिलता...औपचरिकता भी अब एक औपचरिकता बन के रह गयी है. सम्बन्ध है मगर संबंधों में प्राण नहीं है..ऊष्मा नहीं है. अब अपने ही मन में ये विश्वास नहीं रहा की अपनी भावनाओं को सही शब्द या उचित अभिव्यक्ति दे पाएंगे जिस से सामने वाला शख्श उसे समझ पाए तो फिर किसे दोष दें।शायद अब भावनाएं ज्यादा जटिल हो गयी
ReplyDeleteहैं...
Thanks for wonderful Expressions...
DeleteThanks for wonderful Expressions...
Delete